The Let's all laugh at Spurs Thread

[jayramfootball]

Has Conte burst into tears yet in yet another emotional TV meltdown?
He’s Kevin Keegan on speed.

[Goonerred]

Tottenham only have Top 4 to play for now...

[jayramfootball]

Tottenham only have Top 4 to play for now...

Good , they haven't won a trophy in 14 years.. and that run needs to keep extending.

[Highbury Hillbilly]

Nah, they won't get top 4. Far too many in their squad are Championship level or lower. Harry Winks, Matt Doherty, Emerson....these guys belong in the League of Ireland or lower.

[Phil71]

"I was in the squad last time Tottenham won a trophy! It's pathetic! I've been married, divorced, had four kids, retired and been on Celebrity Big Brother. And spurs still haven't won a trophy!"

Jamie O'Hara on Talksport

[Phil71]

As Chelsea fans begin to face up to a miserable, trophyless future and a years of second rate signings, you have to wonder how long government sanctions have been in place at Tottenham.

[jayramfootball]

As Chelsea fans begin to face up to a miserable, trophyless future and a years of second rate signings, you have to wonder how long government sanctions have been in place at Tottenham.

[Phil71]

PSG apparently about to sack Poch and replace him with Conte.

[Goonerred]

PSG apparently about to sack Poch and replace him with Conte.

You couldn't make it up. Did they? Is it fake news????

[Clarkey T]

I'm sure Daniel Levy must tell some lies to get certain managers to accept the Spurs job.

Jose Mourinho - We all know he needs to spend money to build a team... yet he took the Spurs job.
Antonia Conte - Another one who needs to spend money to build a team... yet he took the Spurs job.

Are they genuinely being promised a big kitty?

Or were they given big wages and don't care if they get a transfer kitty or not because they know they'll get a big pay out when sacked?

I think Mourinho would probably accept that, but not Conte, I don't think he's interested in settling for a top 6 push each year... I doubt he's bothered about the money so for this reason if Tottenham don't back him in the summer then I don't see Conte being at Tottenham very long... I can even see him resigning just so a potential new employer doesn't have to pay Tottenham any money for him.

[alexafc12]

I'm interested to see how much Spurs end up spending this summer. Especially since that is what Conte will demand to stay ...

Kulasevski and Romero are both on loan with buy obligations - so this summer they will have to put down £70m for them both. They also paid £25m for Bentacur in Jan so that's close to £100m already.

It's for frustrating we bottled CL football because had we pipped Spurs to 4th I really feel they would have struggled to compete in the market.

I suspect key for them will be moving on some of their loanees - interesting to see how Levy manages here. Lo Celso is on +£100k and Ndombele reportedly £200k. If they get sizeable fees for either then that will only evidence further how useless Edu is in the market.

[EliteKiller]

I'm interested to see how much Spurs end up spending this summer. Especially since that is what Conte will demand to stay ...

Kulasevski and Romero are both on loan with buy obligations - so this summer they will have to put down £70m for them both. They also paid £25m for Bentacur in Jan so that's close to £100m already.

It's for frustrating we bottled CL football because had we pipped Spurs to 4th I really feel they would have struggled to compete in the market.

I suspect key for them will be moving on some of their loanees - interesting to see how Levy manages here. Lo Celso is on +£100k and Ndombele reportedly £200k. If they get sizeable fees for either then that will only evidence further how useless Edu is in the market.

Your numbers are way off - Kulu, Romero and Bentacur are all on payment plans - about 12m a year for five years covers all three. Spurs have also converted 250m of "Covid Loss" into a 20 year bond type deal - so about 15m a year .... and they've now had the first full season of stadium revenue - Joshua, Gaga, Conferences that's probably added 100m to their income, they sell over 1m of beer alone at NFL games. Strong rumour that they are very close to a massive naming rights deal .... bottom line they are feckin' loaded. FFP is gone it's now FFS where wages you can pay are based on a % of income, Spuds have one of the lowest %'s in the league, The timing for them getting CL has been perfect, and we let that happen,

[alexafc12]

I'm interested to see how much Spurs end up spending this summer. Especially since that is what Conte will demand to stay ...

Kulasevski and Romero are both on loan with buy obligations - so this summer they will have to put down £70m for them both. They also paid £25m for Bentacur in Jan so that's close to £100m already.

It's for frustrating we bottled CL football because had we pipped Spurs to 4th I really feel they would have struggled to compete in the market.

I suspect key for them will be moving on some of their loanees - interesting to see how Levy manages here. Lo Celso is on +£100k and Ndombele reportedly £200k. If they get sizeable fees for either then that will only evidence further how useless Edu is in the market.

Your numbers are way off - Kulu, Romero and Bentacur are all on payment plans - about 12m a year for five years covers all three. Spurs have also converted 250m of "Covid Loss" into a 20 year bond type deal - so about 15m a year .... and they've now had the first full season of stadium revenue - Joshua, Gaga, Conferences that's probably added 100m to their income, they sell over 1m of beer alone at NFL games. Strong rumour that they are very close to a massive naming rights deal .... bottom line they are feckin' loaded. FFP is gone it's now FFS where wages you can pay are based on a % of income, Spuds have one of the lowest %'s in the league, The timing for them getting CL has been perfect, and we let that happen,

The numbers are what are reported. Almost all deals in football are staggered payments - doesn't change the fact that they have spent a big outlay on players already. Their latest financial report has £140m of transfer debt - the above deals will get added to that and then paid down year on year.

They are certainly not 'feckin' loaded' going by their latest financial report and they have a huge rebuilding job to do in the summer. They have about 5 CL quality players in their squad. I agree though, per my opening comment a lack of CL football this year would have really hurt them.

[Santi]

People always mention staggered deals as if it makes it cheaper…I don’t get it.

If all your deals are staggered, then you’re still paying for transfers from 3-4 years ago as well so even the argument about temporarily freeing up more funds doesn’t wash.

[EliteKiller]

I'm interested to see how much Spurs end up spending this summer. Especially since that is what Conte will demand to stay ...

Kulasevski and Romero are both on loan with buy obligations - so this summer they will have to put down £70m for them both. They also paid £25m for Bentacur in Jan so that's close to £100m already.

It's for frustrating we bottled CL football because had we pipped Spurs to 4th I really feel they would have struggled to compete in the market.

I suspect key for them will be moving on some of their loanees - interesting to see how Levy manages here. Lo Celso is on +£100k and Ndombele reportedly £200k. If they get sizeable fees for either then that will only evidence further how useless Edu is in the market.

Your numbers are way off - Kulu, Romero and Bentacur are all on payment plans - about 12m a year for five years covers all three. Spurs have also converted 250m of "Covid Loss" into a 20 year bond type deal - so about 15m a year .... and they've now had the first full season of stadium revenue - Joshua, Gaga, Conferences that's probably added 100m to their income, they sell over 1m of beer alone at NFL games. Strong rumour that they are very close to a massive naming rights deal .... bottom line they are feckin' loaded. FFP is gone it's now FFS where wages you can pay are based on a % of income, Spuds have one of the lowest %'s in the league, The timing for them getting CL has been perfect, and we let that happen,

The numbers are what are reported. Almost all deals in football are staggered payments - doesn't change the fact that they have spent a big outlay on players already. Their latest financial report has £140m of transfer debt - the above deals will get added to that and then paid down year on year.

They are certainly not 'feckin' loaded' going by their latest financial report and they have a huge rebuilding job to do in the summer. They have about 5 CL quality players in their squad. I agree though, per my opening comment a lack of CL football this year would have really hurt them.

The "latest" published financial reports cover the 2020-21 season which was the empty stadium season, Why do they have a huge rebuilding job? We are apparently progressing with 34 points in 2022 - Spuds under Conte have 41 points in 2022 - only 2 less than City. If they sign six new players (as Conte is demanding) they will then have a squad that's only behind City and the Dippers.

Sure they have spent reasonable money, 320m in the last three years, but they have also seen their income (ignoring Covid) go from 150m a decade ago to an estimated 500m for this current season - as we know building a 60,000 stadium will do that.

Over the two years of Covid Spurs reported losses of 80.2m and 67.7m that compares to us reporting 54m and 127m .... they have converted those losses into a twenty year bond, have we?

You're wrong they are loaded .... they have 100m of players to sell who are currently all out on loan .... N'Dombele, Gill, Lo Celso, Clarke, Cameron Carter Vickers and they signed Pepp Sarr last year, one of the top rated junior DMs in Europe, who will join them this summer.

Our only hope is that their CEO keeps his hands in his pockets and Conte buggers off ....

Your final point is right, us giving them CL football, that's 50m we won't get and 50m they will .... 100m difference next season, a huge swing that will really hurt