Here is his interview
1. Are you scared?
Scared of what? Interviews? No chance. I'm not scared. I've got 8 pictures of me in my local, on the "wall of shame" - when it comes to the public eye, i'm the coolest cat in the alley.
2. Introduce yourself
Alright then. I'm Whee, 20 year old idiot with no real direction in life. Plans to be hilarious are on the horizon though.
3. Where are you?
On the new sofa in my room. It's cream, it's leather, and you probably couldn't afford it.
4. What's something you wish you could understand better?
Women.
Religion too, to an extent. While I think it's bullshit, a little education beyond the braindead masses level never hurt anyone did it?
5. Would you rather find your true love or be a millionaire?
Hmm. Tricky.
Money, and all the f**k pieces in the world wanting to chew on my nob.... or (knowing my luck) true love being some 17 stone whale.
I'll take a stab on the cash please.
6. What are you afraid of?
Dying younger than I should do. There's a lot of work I need to get done to complete my japing legacy, I don't want it ended sooner. I've come close a couple of times, and as a result, motorcyclists are c****, and transit vans should be blown up.
7. Who's your friends at Goonersworld?
Hey, i'm not picking favourites here, this is highly conraversial. I text SGW quite a lot. UFGN (no longer with us) was a legendary member too. I'vemet up with him a couple of times at games, the most recent one being Bolton in the FA Cup replay in February. We've got plans for the Amsterdam tournament too, although I am currently low on funds. Cunting sofa.
8. Is there any members you would like to know better?
LRL/Ken/CLS are the boys that seem up for a laugh, i'm sure some japes would be had with that lot after a few beers.
9. What's your favourite thing to do offline?
Masturbate vigorously to midget porn. I never realised it was possible to get yourself off while crying with laughter at the same time. It sounds funny, by all accounts.
10. What does your room look like?
Right, let's set this f***ing scene. You walk in through my door (the one with the massive Arsenal badge poster on the outside) and to your immediate right is the short wall (opposite window). Against this wall is my TV, a 32" LCD jobby. I need a big tv to compensate for other areas blah blah (it's massive, so jog on.)
To the side of the tele i've got my guitar, amp, beer fridge (world class) and all the everyday bullshit you put on a bedside table. ALthough i'm a cheap skate and just have shelves. f**k drawers, they're for W****rs.
Then you've got the bed, where the magic doesn't happen. Don't turn the matress over if you have a fear of blood. Note - it's not mine. My bed's under the window so I can perve on my hot neighbours while I jerk off on those cold and lonely winter nights.
I've got a walk in cupboard with all my clothes/dvd's etc etc inside.
Then against the other wall is this cool dudie sofa.
It's cool, you'd like it.
11. Which celebrity would you like to sleep with?
I'd give that Nell McAndrew tart a proper good anal bashing.
12. If you had a choice to sleep with your perfect celebrity or Arsenal win the treble which would you choose?
Treble. Nell would be for 25 seconds - Arsenal is for life.
13. What's the best thing to do if it snows?
We don't get snow down here, but in Berlin I used to knock on people's doors and then chuck snow at them when they opened it. I've not grown up much.
14. Have you ever been arrested?
Spent a couple of nights under lock and key for being a dick. Got knicked for criminal damage that I actually didn't commit. I couldn't even breathe voluntarily, let alone pick bricks up and throw them.
15. What's the best night out you have had?
I had a massive jape in Cambridge last year. London too, Southampton was cool. Anywhere that's not a regular night out is awesome I guess.
I suppose my favourite was a night out locally, I got my brown wings in a football centre circle with some bint with zero self respect. Ace ride.
16. Is there anything else you want to add to let Goonersworld know about you?
I think you get the general idea about me. I'm a decent enough lad, love life, but could probably do with a few more sensible pills everynow and again.
you do seam like a good laugh, we will have a few beers on the GOONERSWORLD NIGHT OUT!!!
