Should guys be at the birth?

[Trina]

I've just been watching This Morning and there was a couple on there who both agreed the guy shouldn't be at the birth and see her in that way. So she had her mum there instead and the guy went to bed whilst she was in labour!

Isn't that how they used to do it in the old days? The bloke had to wait outside.

Personally I wouldn't have had it any other way giving birth with Lily. I was worried all through pregnancy he would miss it!

The guy said he felt useless and wouldn't have known what to do. But surely all guys doing it for the first time feel the same?

My chap told me after, that when I was in the toilet he said to the midwife its his first time and he's nervous and doesn't really know what to do. They were great with him and now and again told him to do things/say things, but he did great by himself anyway.

I don't see the problem with the bloke being at the birth, surely its one of those once in a lifetime experiences and to do it together makes the bond between the couple stronger.

So what do you think, for both those with kids and without.

[Massa]

yeah I think they should, he offers a type of emotional support that cannot be replicated by a mother

[Inchpräctice]

I think I'm going to wimp out and stand outside, sorry.
As it happens my Mrs doesn't really want me in there anyway.

[gzagee]

I was at the birth of my daughter. I feel I had to be, my missus needed me there to help her through the waves of contractions.
Not saying all men should do; each man is different. And I don't balme any man that chooses to wait outside.
But I felt I should be there seeing as she's my first.

[Younggooner08]

My friend has a 2 month old daughter and he was actually in there delivering the baby, not sure how it works but thats what i got told . I personally do want to be in there when i have a child and would even like to deliver it but maybe being that close is a bit much for me.

[StLGooner]

I never felt any kind of special feeling or connection while watching my sons birth, it was more of a worrying thing for me than anything. But after years past and I have reflected on that time, I certainly am glad that I was in the room and that I didn't miss it.

Like gza said though, every one is different, and if a father chooses not to see it, it isn't wrong of him. Because its not really about being there to see the birth, its about being there the rest of its life to mold them into a good human being.

[Fabrestuta]

The man bloody well better be there or he can look forward to it being brought up in every single argument from then until the day he dies.

[EvAMY-CRAIGLEEAFC]

I was at both my kids births. I am guessing there will be some women who would prefer their men not to be there. For my first one, Jade i was sent home. Only to be called back just over an hour later. My Mrs would have killed me if i had not made it.

[Fabrestuta]

Man you are obviously not married. Wives will hold you eating the last slice of bread against you and liken you to Stalin for doing so. Saying they shouldn't hold it against you is like saying lions shouldn't kill zebra's...its just in their nature.

[Est83]

I never felt any kind of special feeling or connection while watching my sons birth, it was more of a worrying thing for me than anything. But after years past and I have reflected on that time, I certainly am glad that I was in the room and that I didn't miss it.

Like gza said though, every one is different, and if a father chooses not to see it, it isn't wrong of him. Because its not really about being there to see the birth, its about being there the rest of its life to mold them into a good human being.

I can't really relate as I haven't fathered any kids yet, but my mum did re-marry about six years ago and has since had a baby boy. He's now four and a half, and although I wasn't there to see the birth (cause that would be nasty!) he is the only being that I've seen/known from birth... and I think because of that - and obviously because he's my brother - I have a connection with him. It's a border-line obsession! Think about him every day, talk about him all the time. My girlfriend's actually worried that when we have kids I'll still prefer time with my little brother than my own youngsters

My point is that you can still have that unbreakable connection even after missing the birth. A little different maybe because he's just my brother and not my son, but there's a strong connection there.

[StLGooner]

Man you are obviously not married. Wives will hold you eating the last slice of bread against you and liken you to Stalin for doing so. Saying they shouldn't hold it against you is like saying lions shouldn't kill zebra's...its just in their nature.

Not all wives are the same of course, I could see how some wouldn't want them in the room, in fact my friends wife said he didn't have to be there, but that she didn't care either way.

[Fabrestuta]

I was speaking more out of jest Zenith.

[Zenith]

I was speaking more out of jest Zenith.

Allright!

[Trina]

The couple mentioned one of the reasons was like you said Zenith, the sexual affection afterwards. However, they said it took a year to get close and enjoy it again even though he didn't see any of it.

[StLGooner]

I'm not sure there is anything out there that would stop me wanting to have sex.